Star Advice
This memory came to a little while back while riding my number 25 bus to work. I was thinking about human behaviour. Our prejudgements, stereotypes. How all of this affects our comfort level around others - for better or worse.
Back in 1988 my wife worked at the Ramada Renaissance Hotel on avenue du Parc in Montreal. She worked at the front desk. Working at the front desk you pretty much get to see all the guests of the hotel and you end up engaging in some level of conversation - even if it is only to give them their room number and key.
This particular night a man came around with his wife. He strolled up to the front desk and asked for restaurant recommendations. They were looking for a nice place to go for vegetarian cuisine. My wife gave it some thought and recommended two different restaurants - one was Le Commensal, the other was Cafe Santropol. The former she suggested was a little on the expensive side and so she leaned them towards Cafe Santropol.
Le Commensal is not particularly expensive (well it wasn't then, I have no clue today) and it was a cafeteria style place where you picked your own food from a buffet and sat yourself down with a tray. You have to remember that she and I were students at the time so she was answering the question from that perspective.
The conversation between my wife and these two hotel guests lasted ten or so minutes. She let them know what to see in Montreal and gave out typical tourist info. They thanked her for being so nice to her and for taking the time to explain. Off they went for the night out.
When my wife turned around her colleagues behind the front desk were standing, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. She wondered what the heck was wrong. They asked her whether she had any clue who she had been speaking to and she said no, just some hotel guests. Big deal? And that is the point.
Had she known who it was, had the expected stereotypes flooded her brain, she may have stumbled through her conversation. She may not have been as open, as honest, as much herself. She may not have connected with these two human beings the way she did. Too often we are too quick to judge others, too hard on ourselves. We lack the confidence in our character and personality. In our beliefs. We modify our thoughts to match what we make out to be the expected behaviour for someone of the stature, class, profession, age that we are speaking to. That is too bad. We should be confident and happy with our uniqueness. By doing so we have the chance of really opening up and making a connection.
She never did find out whether Peter Gabriel and Rosanna Arquette followed her advice.
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